Yesterday we have seen how insanely expensive is the decision to stay, when being mistreated, when the wellbeing and wholeness are being disregarded.
We are not going to talk about the whys now, why this is happening if -like all relationships- things start off nicely and people treat each other well for a couple of days/weeks/months. The why is not even that important when it happens.
We shall look at the cost of leaving and the possibilities it opens.
Let's face it- a relationship, a deep, good relationship blooming out of love and reciprocity, support and complete presence - is a marathon.
Very few people really want a good relationship- because it requires a continues work on self, a continuous conversation with the other, opening instead of closing when hurting is not accepted but both parts need to learn a new language, the language of love and vulnerability.
Running a marathon is very hard but very possible and fun if the preparation for it, and then the journey itself, is a choice -the choice to stay present no matter what, the choice to stay open even if the instinct is to retreat and find a new candy- and your partner is also up to it.
The cost of leaving
-a person deciding to leave will need to pay in vulnerability : the road ahead is not marked, the page is blank -where to even start, how? The person needs to find these out on her/his own.
- a person leaving a hurtful situation/relationship needs to pay in time - the time which otherwise would have been spent on other things, on building and developing a project will have to be used in a different, new direction. This is very time costly. The person will have to look closely at the issue and find solutions, find a way to move on.
-leaving is also adding to the financial cost- a person leaving a hurtful job or relationship will have to figure out ways of survival financially. Returning back home or starting to work a double shift or side jobs would need to be taken in consideration and actually put into practice.
-leaving will put the person in the face of loneliness and losing "friends " - this is a very difficult step for many people. Leaving a save, comfortable even if toxic environment is extremely hard. It requires that the person recognizes their need to feel good, the desire to live differently and therefore - be different from that group.
The possibilities of leaving
- discovering the power of the heart- loving yourself is the main source of love in life. Only when this source id flowing into yourself you can give something precious and real to the world
- discovering new ways of living and meeting people who wish the same, heading in the same direction that of complete, unconditional presence.
-discovering the power of truth, authenticity and courage - living in truth and self respect is a new way of living. It requires the practice of consciousness, saying no to most of the things society is offering and it requires concentrated attention on heart over fame/fake relationships. Arriving at this point in development requires that first step into the unknown.