"Well, I am a student for life and of Life"- I said to myself. Another day was coming to an end. I was happy about it. Oh yeah, I was.
A train of thoughts is trespassing my mind.
Today's thoughts, like those of yesterday, are compressed in one of these compartments. I have been listening to this sound for quite some years now. I am curios about it.
Where do these thoughts come from? Where is this train going? Am I standing at the right station even? Is this train ever going to stop? Who is driving it? For how long?
Questions and more questions...
In the meantime, let me tell you about some thoughts, authors and ideas I've had the opportunity to "meet" lately. These writers made me to question everything. I had to set up new logistics for the trains in my head.
Reaching Down the Rabbit Hole by Dr Allan Ropper and B.D. Burrell
Very simply put, reading this book is like taking a journey into the human brain wonderland. Stories around real characters are popping everywhere.
Knowing that the main characters of the stories, collected by each of the authors, have been real people, the MIND starts making references, finding similar stories in the reader's mind(mine!) and so the web grows, it deepens and it becomes larger. We are all caught in it.
I am not qualified to say anything about the medical side of the story or the methods applied, but reading all these stories about human beings suffering from different brain diseases or damages reminded myself that humans are soooo damn fragile.
The human bodies are such a contradiction. They are so fragile perishable, and yet so strong.
Survival transformed us in mysterious Survival machines. A sound human being will do anything to live a day longer, if possible. One more breath. One more day.
There are many stories in this book when patients were asked: Do you want to live or die? Do you want us to make your "exit" easier or do you want to fight till the end? Do you want your family to be there when it happens?
These are questions sending trepidations thought-out families, generations to come, through my whole being also. This one decision will be influencing the future of all.
Again, the miracle of reading made "my presence" possible in the operation room. I could hear, see and feel the concentration in the there. These surgeons were cutting sharply, drilling and opening the brain up. They were watching tumors in their very toxic nakedness.
When in pain, we rely on other humans. Doctors, in this case neurologists- are taking life or death decisions day my day, sometimes they have to do that in the middle of the night or under huge pressure. Accepting failure and death as part of life and being alive.
Wow, what a heavy responsibility to carry. The soul crushing feeling of losing, after having tried everything, is their way of living every day.
Surrounded by setbacks by Thomas Erikson
This is the latest book by the one and only Thomas Erikson.
This one impressed me in different ways.
For example, did I know that Thomas Erickson before becoming Thomas Erickson had been trying for 20 years to get his books published?
And yet, this is the reality.
Wow, he never gave up during all those years while receiving refusals and being ignored.
Only a couple of years back did the world notice that his work is actually really valuable, bringing original insights we did not have before. Insights on how human beings function as personalities, how the environment and the circumstances influence them.
This is like trying to explain the MIND when we don't even have a physical representation of it. We have the brain -sure, we look at it, study and observe it, but we don't know exactly: how the hell does the brain function in reality?
How do we stay alive, why and more that that, how do we understand each other?
This is a book with a crystal clear message. When facing a problem, an unmet need - do something about it yourself. Accept that responsibility. Take action no matter how small that action might be. Without action nothing will happen.
The paragraph when the author is talking about some of the major issues he has had - 2 divorces, big car accident, financial issues- can extinguish all doubtful fires, I already see haters and doubters setting up.
Spoiler alert! No human being, no matter how successful, rich or beautiful, will be exonerated of difficulties while alive. I am sorry. In this book we can learn how different characters ( the 4 colors ) manage difficulties or how they could improve themselves in that sense.
The Maths of Life and Death by Kit Yates
Reading this book represents my attempt to talk to numbers, to understand them, to listen to them.
I am thinking in images, in feelings and colors.
Numbers are there, I see them, I know some rules governing their exitance and how they interact with each other, but I cannot talk to them.
I read this book in order to understand them, to hear their message and maybe to communicate with them :)
For ex. if I see the number 2, this is like a door slammed in my face.
If I see instead the representation of 2 trees for example, I can come up with a whole story around it and about it. And a whole animated universe to hug those trees also.
Kit Yates is a Senior Lecturer in mathematical biology at the University of Bath and I'm a Senior Life Student : ) as I've mentioned. The author really knows numbers, he understands them and he seems to have a channel of communication with them. Exactly the skill I would like to learn.
Just like philosophy is explaining the MIND in words, numbers seem to encapsulate the world in a net of correlations.
If you get to understand one part, you can grow to understand the whole universe. Science is in fact doing this very thing - discovering and explaining the world, the human representation of the world - I may add- in numbers, theories and logical connections and outcomes.
In this book I could see how great mistakes were made when humans misunderstood the numbers or used them in the wrong way- meaning that they sought to prove a specific outcome. And if I take a look outside these days, where scientific proof is invoked every time a new cure or new miraculous product is created, this is still happening. The numbers, or their power, their meaning is being misused.
We life in a confusing, dangerous and disrupted world.
We live in a world full of possibilities, changes leading to newness, opportunities to seize and new meanings to find.
What does our mind resonate with? Where is your train of thoughts taking you?